Favorite George Grand-isms

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Favorite George Grand-isms

Post by F1nut » Sat Apr 23, 2016 12:59 am

These are but a few of classic George. We'll start off with this qualifier.....
What I'm about to say may offend some people, but you need to know up front that I don't give a damn."
George on life in general.
A baseball hat, worn fashionably backwards, is usually a sure sign of a complete moron.

If she sounds nice on the phone, or over the radio, she's tipping the scales at between 250 and 300.

The more lights and buzzers, the worse the piece will sound.

Dollar (or less) a watt. Fair price for anything usually.

Personally, I don't hold my flatus for anyone. You can get a wicked stomach ache that way. I know that you guys don't want me to get a stomach ache.

How about the sayings that are pure bullshit? Like, "What you can't see, can't hurt you." Obviously, this asshole never saw Predator. Or, like closing your eyes before you jump in a wood chipper is gonna help.

"Honesty is the best policy." Right. I have gotten the daylights beat out of me for telling the truth. Telling the truth is situational.

"A bird in the hand, is worth two in the bush." ANYBODY have ANY damn idea what this is supposed to mean? Who do you sell birds TO, IF you have /catch one?

"Better to be safe than sorry." Ever see the babes that hang out with the "safe" guys? No thanks.

"Any landing you can walk away from....." BULLSHIT! It's a lot better if you can USE THE AIRPLANE AGAIN after you walk away.
George on stupid people.
Please tell me you're not as stupid as you sound. If you can't say that, try not saying anything.

Hey stupid, has it occurred to you that each and every person that has posted on this thread is sitting at home in front of their computer, laughing their asses off at how dumb you are. Did you think about that? Do you think?

I noticed that this knuckleheads threads disappear fairly quickly. What pray tell are the chances his stupid, long-winded self got banned or eaten by a pterodactyl.

Try to do something special for SOMEONE special, and that little loser is too stupid to realize it's not a good time to be him and stupid.

Bet when you were younger you had to ride the bus. The little one at that. Still have the helmet?

George Grand (of the Jersey Grand's)
I think it was either the bumble bee, or the jet engine, that does not work on paper. Both technologies seem to operate fine in day to day applications, they just don't work on paper. Moral of the story.... Don't listen to paper.

George Grand (of the Jersey Grand's)
You might laugh but Jenny McCarthy can run like the wind..... but not with a nose full of chloroform she can't. I ever get within twenty feet of that girl, she's mine.

Beer sucks. Tastes real bad. Real bad. Never acquired a taste for it, and to be brutally honest, when you guys turn sideways in the mirror, I'll bet you wish you never did either. I have a rum/cognac figure.
The "meteorological specialist" on Channel 6 (ABC) here in the South Jersey/Filthadelphia area is a piece of candy with legs attached. Man is she hot. Dumb as a stick too. She's a marathon runner, so once she got a look at my Lucky Strike habit, somebody would have to whack her in the knee so I could catch her. That would be fine with me. I'd chloroform that girl in a minute if I could get close enough.

I 'd give Diane Sawyer a shot if she asked nicely. She looks like she'd be real soft to the touch.
George on a group photo taken at an audio gathering his house and he was in the picture. So was I......LOL
Last time I saw a picture of a group of people that looked like this, was when I was in high school. It was a motivational poster to keep kids from dropping out.

George Grand (of the Jersey Grands)
This one is my favorite.
Young guys who THINK they hate everything.

It takes YEARS to develop a true hatred for everything. Hatred has to be nurtured. It has to be slowly developed. It needs to simmer for years.
My hatred for everything is the Great Mother of all Hatred. The Sistine Chapel of Hatred. The Mona Hatred. The Great Wall of Hatred. The Iron Hatred.
Younger guys just can't hate the way an older hate specialist can. I have a degree in both Hateology AND Hatenautics. I am qualified to teach Hate.
When I really hate something you can see the actual hate "rays" coming off me. I possess a scientifically measurable hate aura as it were, that has been seen in certain photographs that were taken of me.

George Grand (of the Jersey Grands)
And finally......the truth!
There's no substitute for large radiating surfaces and a man's amp.
Political Correctness...defined

A doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

Make America Great Again

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